What my wife taught me about process, documentation, and getting things out of your head.
This morning I took my son to the allergist while my wife was out of town.
He’s in treatment for a milk allergy. The protocol is exposure, slowly increasing how much milk he drinks. Which means you bring milk to the appointment.
Before she left, my wife put a paper list on the counter. What time. Which doctor. What paperwork. What to pack for camp afterward (swim day). The schedule for the whole day.
She makes a list like this each time she leaves. It stings every time. I’m a capable guy. I’ve run companies. I don’t need instructions.
But she’s not writing it down because she doubts me. She’s spent years running our whole household from her head. And whatever doesn’t make it onto paper, I end up texting her about.
So, list in hand, how’d I do?
I forgot the milk.
For the milk allergy appointment.
I stood there doing the math on whether I had time to drive home. I’d already dropped our other son at a friend’s house earlier so they could get him to camp and we could make the appointment. Turns out the office keeps milk on hand.
Then at camp drop-off, I realized I didn’t know the gate code. Texted my wife. She sent the code. No “it’s on the list.” No lecture. Just the code.
I sit across from owners every week who haven’t written their processes down. Not because they don’t care. When they imagine documenting everything, it’s overwhelming. So it stays in their head.
My wife didn’t document everything. She wrote one page, for one day.
And I still missed twice, which will happen. My scorecard took a hit this morning. But when someone misses a step: send the code, not the lecture.